Sure, but is it Babysitter Worthy...?
A Ratings Scale For Those Rare, Child-Free Leisure Hours

Before I had kids, my faith in the wisdom of critics and reviewers was near-absolute. They were my own private Sherpas to my leisure hours, guiding me toward the best movies and events, the first-rate restaurants, and the latest can’t-put-‘em-down books. This near-religious commitment to the opinions of perfect strangers has long baffled my husband, who finds consulting a critic’s opinion to be akin to asking for movie recommendations from any stranger off the street.

Now that those glorious child-free leisure hours are in short supply, my thirst for critics’ opinions is even more acute. I scan movie listings and book reviews searching for those “A” ratings, hunt for the restaurants earning four stars and scour for events that earn two thumbs up, all on a mission to take my free time to its highest and best potential.

But these days, those ratings systems used by even my favorite critics aren’t quite cutting it anymore. Sure, I still want to know which movies fail to live up to the hype, which restaurants stand out from the homogenized pack, and which events are not to be missed. But what I really want to know is, is it worth getting a babysitter for?

Those days of spontaneously dashing out the door for a late dinner at a just-opened bistro downtown are – at least temporarily – behind me, replaced by weeks of planning and phone calls to secure a qualified babysitter who’s available in the magical time window you desire. "Oh, you have soccer practice until 7:00? Okay, let me call the restaurant back and move the reservation, then I’ll call you back and confirm. Oh, and I need to pick you up, too...?"

Many of us have seen our leisure-time budgets shrink since becoming parents as well, and adding babysitter costs to an evening can make the difference between an evening at Blue Point Grille and a burger at Applebee’s. So with the added effort and expense, it’s no wonder that parents like us tend to stick to the tried-and-trues, the destinations that we can be sure won’t disappoint us, that we can be certain are worth getting a babysitter for.

So in the interest of all those parents who would like to get out there and try new destinations without fear of what may be babysitter-worthy, I suggest the following handy Babysitter-Worthy Ratings Scale:

Four Babies: This is the grand prize of babysitter-worthiness. It doesn’t matter how many phone calls you have to make or inflated prices you may have to pay. Call in any favor, offer up your first-born, and if all else fails, ditch your spouse and go alone. Even if you have to mend things with your estranged sister in sufficient time to get her to babysit, make the call. Yes, I know it wasn’t your fault. Apologize anyway and get her on the calendar. An event earning four Babies is worth it, no matter the effort or expense required. Think dinner at Lola with a personal visit to your table by Chef Symon himself. Think courtside seats to the CAVS in the NBA Finals. Got it? Now get on the phone.

Three Babies: Yes, you’ll be disappointed if you miss a three-Baby event because the babysitter flaked out on you. You may join your newborn in crying yourself to sleep tonight, but you will get over it. Call all the babysitters on your list, even the ones who charge so much that it pains you to write them a check for $75 when you know they were parked on your couch most of the night, watching a “My Sweet 16” marathon and finishing off your favorite chips while your kids slept.

Two Babies: You know that hierarchy of babysitters you have, with the good, expensive and hard-to-get ones at the top and the young, less experienced but affordable ones at the bottom? Start at the bottom of the list in your search for a babysitter for an event that earns just two Babies. It’s probably not worth digging deep to secure that upper-echelon babysitter, but the sweet 13-year-old down the street who just got her babysitting certification is the perfect fit for a two-Baby event, restaurant or destination.

One Baby: Perhaps you’re one of those lucky parents with an over-eager mother-in-law who begs for the opportunity to watch your kids. Or a grandmotherly neighbor who dotes on your children and insists on watching them, shooing you out the door and refusing your promises to pay her. An event or destination earning just a single Baby isn’t even worth cashing in on such a coveted babysitter jackpot. Under such circumstances, please do go out. Think of the rest of us poor souls without such accessible childcare when you do. Just don’t waste your time with this one-Baby destination.

From Cool Cleveland contributor Jennifer Keirn jenniferkATwowway.com
Comments? Letters@CoolCleveland.com

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