Dueling dialogue that's unsafe at any speed

Social and cultural commentators Tisha Nemeth and Deb Remington dig into discourse that evaluates Cleveland's segregated arts and literary community, and the energetically intense dynamics of relational connections.

Tisha Nemeth: I'm noticing Cleveland's clique-ish attitude which is a toxic mentality. There's even segregation within groups that go against the “clique” mentality, insulating themselves from their colleagues and community's creative ventures. I've witnessed it not only in the businesses arena, but also in the arts and literary community. Is Cleveland doing all it can to embrace others' diverse interests, while recognizing it as a resource?

Deb Remington: My brain cries over Cleveland's art community’s lack of support for special cultural/arts events that arrive in Cleveland. Being involved in the Rustbelt Poetry Slam which landed for its first time in Cleveland, I witnessed our literary communitity's lack of involvement. I am concerned about the poor attitude coming from our area writers; there were more than enough opportunities for them to assist, and I’m not just addressing the financial aspect of the events! How can we expect the greater regional community to support the arts when those who are directly involved in the creative process don’t show up to support their own?

TN: The feedback I hear from them translates into ignorance until proven innocent...in Cleveland, it’s easier to turn your head away even from a community you’re involved in; if you’re not supporting it, then you’re not actively involved in it, therefore you’re merely interested in supporting your own creative efforts instead of others. It’s a personal choice: when you enter into a group, you can hold yourself to a higher level of responsibility and remain committed or choose not to. Perhaps that is why our city is struggling to creatively get off its feet – there’s a need for more passionate involvement and dedication to specific cultural causes. I'm hearing alot of lip-service about it, but not seeing the results. And I'm going to quote my man Daniel Gray-Kontar: People here want "culture without the commitment."

DR: Commitments are a natural process, and it's one that needs to be excercised more in our city. The lack of commitment has paid a toll here; our creative groups and businesses are suffering because our communities make excuses, refusing to step up their support that they should be delivering - without any excuses.

Speaking of commitments, although this goes into the dynamics of friendship and commitments - do you believe people arrive in your life during a time when you need to know them the most? I once read a book by an author who believed that we are all born into a circle of individuals who will intersect our life journey, regardless of the life we experience on earth. A “tribe” concept, if you will. I have noticed that throughout my life I have meet a few people who “felt right” upon first meeting...and usually they just appeared in my life; a chance meeting.

TN: It’s a natural relational progression, developing a core of people who are significant in your life; we come across so many people who are “networking” in public, in search of people who ‘fit’ their needs, but this is a practice I don’t understand. This topic is pretty esoteric, but its importance lies in the area of developing meaningful relationships. You've got some people who go at it with a forced intensity, and often this bears disappointing results because it is forced. Or, you can go about it serendipitously, with no plan whatsoever, and end up meeting people who mean the world to you...

DR: We need to take better notice of those individuals who “click“ with us. They may arrive to challenge us or to remind us of our potential. I liken it to a deeper connection, a force that binds and provides a fundamental sense of grounding. All too often, we are fighting our need to connect with people who seem to know us best, for fear of appearing weak, vulnerable or defenseless.

TN: Yes, and this is a tangible fear because once a significant connection is made, you then lay yourself out in a transparent way; experiencing this level of trust and connection often times causes people to feel vulnerable. It's why deeper connections in relationships exist on the fringe. Society takes on the “fast food” mentality with friendships; we want a quick fill up of junk food relationships that are mired in superficial rapport, conversational niceties without the connecting on a real level – I’ve met and spoken with many who steer away from deep connection-oriented friendships because it is challenging and there's no sugar coating going on. This makes the relationship more demanding and unexpected. But the payoffs are deeply rewarding in terms of making a real connection; it's the biggest accomplishement I think we can achieve.

DR: People may steer away from it due to ignorance, because choosing that mindset makes relationships easier. But if ignorance is bliss, no wonder I've never been blissful! How can one exist in a condition of being uneducated, unaware or uninformed?

TN: You should consult with the Buddhists on obtaining bliss...

DR: The only Buddhists I know are neither ignorant nor blissful. Where did that saying "ignorance is bliss" come from any way?

TN: Probably a tortured existentialist...once you’ve achieved a hard level of learning, the knowledge itself is what causes the awakening to reality - and that level of understanding is far from bliss.

Got responses? Email them to MBIC@Coolcleveland.com (:divend:)